Ancient History

Dear sweet Lady May. She’s a peach, that one. We recently had a conversation that went something like this:

Mom, were you born around the same time as Benjamin Franklin?
Nope, he’s a lot older than I am honey.
How about when there were dinosaurs? Were you around then?
Ummmm….no. They’re even older than Benjamin Franklin.
Well, how about this song on the radio (The Beatles)? Did they play it at your prom?

Sweet, unfortunate, misguided child. I’m wondering what it is I'm doing to give her the impression:

I'm older than dirt?!

Hellooooo! I’m the mom who hits the pool with them any chance I get. The one who sacrifices great hair just to ride roller coasters, water slides, and boogie boards. The hip chick who outdances them at Hannah Montana Spotlight World Tour for Wii, and hogs the Whack-a-Mole at Chuck E. Cheese just to earn the most tickets. The mother of the year who downloads and sings all songs ever played by Radio Disney (which by the way, has absolutely nothing to do with a mild crush on the Jonas Brothers and/or Zac Efron).

For posterity’s sake, I’d like to make the following points:

I was NOT born before the invention of electricity…though it was before microwave ovens, the Internet, and humongous flower headbands to distinguish between baby girls and baby boys.

Dinosaurs had long been extinct by the time I came along. Sadly, ugly wallpaper had not completely died out.


John Lennon was dead before ANY of my high school proms; however, big hair and big sleeves were alive and well!


We had a great time at the prom--Mark, me, Chicago, and my AquaNet do. Ahhhhhh, the smell of fine solid particles suspended in gas takes me back to the good old days when T-rexes roamed the earth. Turn up the volume and sing it loud people...

You’re the meaning in my life, you’re the in”spray”tion.