Something's fishy

'Bring Your Pet to School Day' is written in very large 3rd grade handwriting on the calendar.

We purchased 3 new pets/food/accessories/equipment for the event.

We painstakingly kept 2 of them alive for the big day.

We can't leave home for longer than 12 hours anymore.

They have taken over our lives, and now...

Lady May just wants to take a picture of them to class.

{deep breath}

Oh, she is SOOOO taking those fish to school.

Diagnosis: IBS

#1. Lady May insists on calling Bella the goldfish, 'Swimmy'.

#2. Bella/Swimmy poops A LOT.

#3. Lady May is horrified Bella/Swimmy will do #2 during pet day at school.

#4. #3 is likely.

#5. I think we should all give the fish a break. She did just lose the love of her life...

In Memorium

Dear Edward the goldfish,

You were only in our home for 12 hours, but you will remain in our hearts forever.

P.S. Don't worry about Bella. Jacob is keeping her company.

(Oh! Have I said too much?)

Meet our new victims:

Edward

&

Bella

Taking the Bait

Lady May hopped in the car after school today excited to inform me her class will be having a 'Bring Your Pet to School Day'.

Really?

Aren't Crazy Hair Day, Pajama Day, Electronic Day, Movie Day, and Water Day enough? It puts an incredible amount of pressure on parents (and usually at the last minute) to be ready at all times with neon blue hairspray, properly fitting, gender appropriate PJ's, iPods up to date with the most current songs, water shoes, clean pillow cases and peanut/gluten/dye/sugar/flavor free snacks for 24 kids!

Who wears water shoes anyway??

Hearing she 'neeeeeeeeds' a pet for school is just about all I can take.

We are pet free for a reason. We've killed our fair share of fish. We've ended one too many hermit crabs. We just aren't 'pet people'. Caring for small, helpless beings isn't in our genetic makeup. It's a miracle our KIDS are still living. Obviously, Lady May hasn't figured that out yet and spent most of the afternoon lobbying for a fish.

What started out as a proposal for a single 5 cent goldfish in a jar has turned into an aquarium with rocks and plants and palm trees and caves and fish that glow in the dark. To top it off, she made 24 copies of this little number so her class could vote on names for her new pets:

Did you notice the fish are now homeless? How do you argue with that?!

I think we just might have to get another fish.

So, tell me: Does this constitute premeditated murder?